This morning, I attended Ash Wednesday mass with my mom. We attended the 11am mass at Our Lady of Refuge Church in Long Beach so that I may be able to go to work directly after mass. DISCLAIMER: I will be completely honest… I have not attended mass in the longest time for reasons that are inexcusable. I have been neglectful of attending mass and making more time for God in my life. But yes, I do plan to make some serious changes starting now. No questions asked.

Anyway, as my mom and I pull up into the parking area at the school. We see the students walking outside and lining up. I suddenly realized that they will be attending mass with the rest of the community as well. A huge hit of nostalgia came to me and I began to become excited to see these young kids.

Walking into church, I remember to get the holy water as I do the sign of the cross, remember to bow before entering the pew, and do some reflection before mass begins. After bowing my head down for a few moments, I look up and see the students walking down the aisles and taking their seats in the reserved pews in the front of the altar. In uniform, with their hands together; the little ones with their hands together as if they are praying, and the upper graders assisting them to their seats. I told my mom how much seeing these kids makes me miss attending private school. Wearing uniforms everyday, learning how to make good choices, and receiving a Catholic education (although I know throughout time I have been inconsistent about practicing), just being an overall good kid like these kids display.

Mass begins. We do the opening song, readings, the gospel, everything that is pretty standard. Then came the homily. Everytime I’ve attended mass, it has been the priest that stands at the mic and begins to do his homily on what the theme for this mass is. Today, the priest came down from his chair and walked over to the pews in front of the students. He then smiled, and began to talk about the Lenten season. What struck me to be inspiring is that he had integrated student participation and walked around the aisles that students were sitting in. Asking questions to the students about their understanding and reinforcing the importance of this season, making big points to them. The students were so engaged that it was beyond inspiring. With every question, the little ones, without hesitation, would shoot their hands in the air, waving them, but waiting quietly to be called on to answer. It was definitely a bright start to my day.

Upon leaving mass and having the ashes on my head, I head off to work. As I make my 25 minute commute to Orange County, I began to reflect upon things I would like to do to make strides not only during Lent, but for my overall lifetime. To become better. Then, I began to think of the students I saw today and the students I see everyday, and how much I love being an educator. This morning’s mass was another sign of reassurance that I am heading in the right direction and that I am still steps away from making my dreams come true.

Once I pulled up to the parking lot at school, I took a few moments in the car to pray and thank God for guiding me in the right direction and for forgiving me for being selfish. Lately, I have been impatient in where I am in my life because I feel like I am moving at a glacial pace to get to where I want to be. But as I was driving to school, I realized that I am exactly where I need to be right now. Because I still have a lot of growing and learning to do, just like my students. And when the time is right, God will let me know.

Thank you, Lord, for giving me some perspective today. I know I have been struggling lately, but I am beginning to see more clearly now. Thank you for forgiving me. I will try my best to carry out acts of love and kindness, and to become a more improved self. I am truly blessed.

However, I worry that if we don’t learn to use things for the good of the Kingdom of God, we might be missing the boat. It’s the same with using your humor to glorify God, or using your body to glorify God, or using your music to glorify God - we can use our phones the same way.